8/29/08 Communicated by my Higher Self "What to do?"

Wednesday, August 29, 2007, 6:16 AM Communicated by my Higher Self

"What to do?"

I hadn’t planned to do a communication with Annie for her blog today, but she likes to know what is going on. Unless she is doing something (writing a short story, editing a story, answering email, or responding to posts on a forum) she doesn’t know what she is doing. And she doesn’t know what she should be doing. When she is in her bedroom, it is OK, because then she either reads a library book or watches TV. But when she is at her computer in the morning, she thinks she should be doing something.

She wrote a short story on Sunday morning, and all Sunday afternoon she edited it. Then she sent it off on email to friends. “Good” she thought, “I am doing something and I know what I am doing.” It was a big story so Monday she was involved with it too. It brought a wave of activity. She got emails in response and she answered the emails. And she posted it up on her Blog on Google, and selected a nice picture to go with it.

And then by late Monday, she was finished with the story and ready for something new. She tried to post on her new political site. But she experienced it as nerve wracking. Either she was knocked off for "time expired" while she was writing her post. Or they gave one minute for editing it, and she watched the seconds elapse as she raced to finish it in time. She thought “I can’t go on like this, it is always about trying to beat the clock.” So she went to Lightworkers and read all the Blogs, and read some of the Channelings. And that relaxed her and interested her.

And she wondered if she would go back to her political site again.

The next day was yesterday. She asked Me "do you want me to write?" “No” I said. “Are you sure?” she asked. “Yes” I said. “Should I go to the political site?” she asked “Maybe not” I said. “Am I ever going to go back there?” she asked. “We’ll see” I said. So she read the HeavenLetter for that day and began to answer email. And that filled up her morning.

But this morning when she asked “do you want me to write?” and I said “no.” And there were no emails. And there was no pull to go on her political site at all, she began to wonder "what am I doing?"

So let's go over everything. The political site is OK. She's never been on a site which was on the clock before, she just has to get used to it. She will learn how the new site works. I think it is a good site for her right now, because in the past she got embroiled on political sites, and I don’t want her to get embroiled on one now. I don’t want it to take over her life. And she finds the experience of being on this new one so empty, there is no foreseeable way it will happen.

She doesn’t understand why I am not having her write her short stories every morning or at least every other morning. Since that pleased her so much. It involved her totally, and when it was over she had something to show for it. But it involved all her energy, and right now I don’t want all her energy to be spent on that. I want her energy to be freed up.

So that leaves us where we are right now. Her energy is freed up and she doesn’t know what to do with it. And I think, Let's just go with the flow and see what happens, what swims into view. We've made a lot of space. We have our full energy. There is nothing so terrible about trying to get thru time on her computer when nothing is happening at all.

Secretly what agitates her about it, is the idea she should be doing something. She has it locked into her mind, “My mornings at the computer are when I do something. My afternoons in my bedroom are when I do nothing.” But what if she doesn’t engage on some project while she is on the computer. What if she just sits here and looks out the window and tries to get thru time on the computer too. There is no law “you do something in the mornings and nothing for the rest of the day.”

Darling what I am trying to say is, if there is nothing to do, then do nothing. Don't look for something to do. What exactly is doing nothing on the computer? It just means being there. It merely means if something wants to find you, it can. You are there for it. Why don't we try it out. You’ve never been "available" for whole day, morning to night. It’s always good to try something new. You don’t realize you are trying something new, because you’re being asked to do nothing. So you assume it means lack of direction, lack of purpose, lack of meaning. But being available with full energy has a lot to be said for it. And you won’t find out what, till you do it.

All my love to all of you, Annie's Higher Self