Nurturing Self.

Boundaries are important for humans. We must participate with our inner selves in order to discover what they are in the first place. Boundaries are the place inside that says "hell no" and we often don't say anything about it at first. But even then we know it might come up later on.

It is about people taking advantage of us in any way. It is about little infringements and big ones. We will decide the ones that are important enough to bring up, and when. But we will grow in self knowledge, and grow spiritually once we stop allowing subtle abuses to pass by us without a care. We will begin to care for us, that no-one may challenge our right to be basically content individuals, without having that contentment stepped upon, at least consistently by those who don't care as much as they might.

Not that we won't be caught up in discontent at times, even that is our right, as people sharing a difficult planet. Even this may constitute a boundary crossed...someone trying to cheer us up when we are being genuinely in tune with feeling of sadness. We can ask them to honor our boundaries to be our authentic and genuine selves...happy, bored, sad, or whatever. Boundaries are the armor for our authenticity.

They emerge from the depths of our souls. The are the limits to what "you" other, is allowed to do to "me" myself, without irregular repercussions. They are about the signs we notice, that we are probably being dis-respected at the moment, the little "sins" against our partial divinity, and our very real ability to protect ourselves from that thing, from that un-nerving lack of care, on the part of the person we need address. Boundaries are charged with light. It is brilliant to protect you and me. Sometimes we will need to be told to set them. Sometimes we do not take enough good care, with our self. Connected to truths from the beyond, that we are light beings who have entered a vessel of flesh, and that we are deserving of great care.

Boundaries say I won't be controlled by you. They speak of our own self-esteem, our self respect. They ask for realistic distances. They admonish softly. We need them on occasion, it's okay to have them, and live a still spiritual life. You are not controlling others by making them either, you are asking them not to control you, that's all. Think about who needs to know about your boundary's today, and think for awhile about how to gracefully administer, these tools for healthier relationships. The ways of doing this are endless. They are as individual as we are.

The persons you must do them with are usually obvious. Be kind, but let them know that place in you, is off limits~ or is to be treated gently. Otherwise there will often be more "necessary actions" to take on your own part, in a given relationship, more stark than setting a few boundaries, there may be a need to explore a deeper change, like letting go of the person who hurts you with constancy, in order that you may thrive in your healthy living. Before giving up on folks, try using this relationship tool (express them casually or thoroughly) creating boundaries to fix the relationship problem...and if they are not respected, maybe even more is needed.

A set boundary is a jewel...when it works out as hoped for, it is absolutely Golden...and something we may keep in our arsenal of self-protection. Not everyone is "for you" in all of life, some will not honor your lines drawn ~and will continue to cross them, but it is alright to set them, it is a test of true friendship, and a test of real love and respect...if failed you will be smarter about who IS "for you" and who isn't just yet...and that is a most helpful thing to know.

Love...