Ah, a woman's life!!!!

This was sent to me to be forwarded:

Victoria's Secret

I know what Victoria 's Secret is.
The secret is that nobody older than 40 can fit into their stuff.
The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight because,
by then, your body and your fat are really good friends.
Just when I was getting used to yesterday,
along came today.

Sometimes I think I understand everything,
then I regain consciousness.
I gave up jogging for my health when my thighs
kept rubbing together and setting my pantyhose on fire.
Amazing!
You hang something in your closet for a while and it shrinks two sizes!

Skinny people irritate me! Especially when they say things like,
'You know, sometimes I just forget to eat.'
Now, I've forgotten my address, my mother's maiden name,
and my keys.
But I've never forgotten to eat. You have to be a special
kind of stupid to forget to eat.

A friend of mine confused her valium
with her birth control pills.
She had 14 kids, but she doesn't really care.

The trouble with some women is.... that
they get all excited about nothing
and then they marry him.

I read this article that said the typical
symptoms of stress are
eating too much, impulse buying,
and driving too fast.
Are they kidding?
That is my idea of a perfect day.

Celebrate Womanhood! Share this with all of those
amazingly brilliant and tremendously talented women
who are intelligent enough to call YOU their friend.