Holistic Language?

So, I received an e-mail today that was mainly an advertisement for holistic and spiritual happenings around New England. I usually quickly scan and delete these messages as they mostly contain the same information week after week. Today, however, I decided to actually read the entire message.

I have to sigh as I write these words because I'm wondering why people feel the need to speak with flowery, descriptive language when they are discussing holistic and spiritual topics. Okay, make that a deep, heavy sigh.

The words went something like this: As the dew dries upon the leafy green forest of your mind, the dawn shines the light of the angels onto the bosom of our world as we offer divine hope to all of our fellow blossoms. Okay, so I took a little poetic license, but you understand what I mean.Why do so many people who think and live holistically feel that they have to speak (and write) like a sixteenth century bard? I don't get it! I live holistically and I'm a spiritual person (duh, I'm a spirit medium), but I don't tend to speak in prose (unless, of course, I'm trying to prove a point).

Personally, I find that this kind of flowery speech tends to turn people away from the cause because they feel like they can't be themselves. Many people, myself included, lose interest after the third or fourth line - and I write poetry! Group this with the fact that we're talking about subjects which are often difficult for people to immediately fathom, and you'll find that it tends to put people off. I also feel that overly poetic holistic language makes holistic professionals seem flaky and amateurish. You wouldn't find a medical doctor comparing your colon to a garter snake swallowing a garden toad, would you? Why should holistic professionals be any different?

I'd like to add that I don't think this really has anything to do with intelligence or intellect. It's more along the lines of "please state your business before I lose interest and something else catches my eye." Toss in some humor. Throw in some satire. Even better, just express yourself in such a way that we can actually understand exactly what you mean. If not, you just might lose me before the message gets across.