love abuse

I have a good friend of mine, who has a problem, and I am looking for ways to try and help her through it, and I thought perhaps you wonderful souls could help me out too.

It goes something like this. She is the most loving and caring person I know. Its in her nature to be totally selfless, give everything of herself to help those she loves. She magnetically attracted people because of her amazing love that she radiated. She was in an abusive relationship with an energy vampire, being abused as a child, he sought to carry on this pattern, beating her whenever he didn't get his way. Naturally no person who cares about themselves would stand up to this, but mixed with a combination of fear and emotional blackmail she stayed in it. This guy knew exactly what to say to her to pull at her heart, drawing sympathy, her amazing love that she is drawing her to help this guy, then he would become angry at her again for some silly reason, making her confused with no where to go. The full circle of love broken, she gives and he takes, when she gives no more, he beats the horse till it starts again. This had been happening for years. It got to the point recently where she was living in such fear and such dispair, she welcomed her own death at his hands, pleaded for it from him, was even willing to take her own life, she had had enough of the emotional abuse. She still lives, but now she has hardened herself to her most precious gift, the love that she was able to share. She sees it now as a faculty that brought her nothing but pain and suffering so she cut it off. Everyone can notice it, she only wants to be alone and generally dislikes everyone for silly reasons.

I thought the point of these times was to integrate love more and more in our lives, not to punished for practicing it.

What I want to know is, what was the point of this experience she went through and how can she learn to forgive and leave behind this painful experience. What aspect of herself was calling for balance? I don't know what to say to this friend, I am just humbled by the scope of the tragedy and the extent that someone will go to to hurt another, diverting all the energy they have in life to ruining another's.

Please help me help her move past this experience with love and respect.