4) What Do Women Want? The Legend of Sir Gawain and the Hag Ragnell Told by Ralph Metzner

So King Arthur was released from his commitment, having answered the riddle that "what women want is to have their own way." He then went back to his castle to tell Sir Gawain the bad news. And on the way to the castle King Arthur met up with the witch, who called out to him. "Now it is time for me to collect my prize. I want to have a wedding in your castle."

And King Arthur said, "Yes, I know. And err, you might as well come along." Arthur was kind of hoping that this could be sort of a quiet little wedding, where they would not invite too many people, and which might sort of go unnoticed. Even Guinevere (King Arthur's wife), made a point of going to the witch and asking her if she would consider having a nice quiet little wedding. And the witch said, "NO WAY! I want a big wedding with all the trimmings. I want you to invite everybody. And I want to have the place of honor next to this noble knight Sir Gawain, because tis is what I deserve. Because (and this is an interesting line here that the witch tells us), you may think I am just a piece of shit, but I am not, I am a lady." (This is a very interesting statement. You may think I am just a piece of shit, because I look like a piece of shit. But I am not. I am a lady. I am a woman. And I deserve respect and honoring. This is a very important point for someone caught in witch consciousness or witch awareness to remember.

Witch consciousness in this instance has nothing to do with Wicca or Paganism and this is an entirely separate discussion. Another version of this story has a more complete reference and discussion on the topic of Paganism and witchcraft that is filed away somewhere. I have a couple blogs on this elsewhere here for those of you that are interested in the views I have expressed so far. Witch consciousness in regard to this story therefore is in reference to when you feel ugly, miserable, like a piece of shit. When you feel that you are worthless and that you are without value.

So they had this big wedding and everyone was extremely glum. Totally bummed out. Long faces all around. Especially certain ladies that had had their eye on Sir Gawain, because he had generally been considered the most eligible bachelor in the kingdom. The ladies of the court were in fact openly crying. Lamenting about what a shame it was and what a waste it was for Sir Gawain to end up with such a hideous creature.

In addition to her ugliness, the witch had incredibly bad table manners. While eating she would shove the food into her face with her hands, drooling all over the place. It was totally disgusting to see. People could not even bear to look at her because she was so repulsive.

Finally the wedding feast came to an end afterwards of course comes the wedding night. And Sir Gawain and the witch--the Hag Ragnell--have retired to the wedding chamber, where Sir Gawain was just sort of standing there in this marvelous bedroom, kind of embarrassed, trying to figure out what to do. Trying not to look or stare in horror at the Hag Ragnell. So there was Gawain, just kind of hanging out, trying very hard to be the noble knight and do his marital duty.

After several minutes of silence had passed between them, the Hag Ragnell said: "Now Sir Gawain, you are my lawful bridegroom and you must kiss me and do your marital duty and make love to me. And I know that you will probably find it hard to do this because I am so ugly, but that is what we agreed on, and you gave your word as an honorable knight and so here we are." So Sir Gawain (who had been kind of staring at the floor and looking the other way) took a deep breath and said, "Okay, I will kiss you." And he turned around to face her. The instant that he turned to look at her, he saw standing before him the most beautiful young woman that he had ever seen in his life.

She had of course changed while he was looking the other way, wondering how he was going to bring himself to face her, and he said: "My God! Who are you??!! How did this happen??!!! And the witch said,

"Well, because you accepted me, and agreed to kiss me and love me, you have released the spell that had been put upon me. However, you have only released the spell halfway. I am now in a position where I will be beautiful half of the time, like I am now, and ugly like the witch you knew before half of the time. Twelve out of every 24 hours I will be beautiful and the other twleve I will be ugly. Now you Sir Gawain have to choose between whether you want me beautiful during the day and ugly at night or beautiful during the night and ugly during the day. You choose.

If you choose to have me beautiful during the day and ugly at night, you will win the envy and admiration of your fellow knights. And I will win the admiration and approval of the court. On the other hand, your pleasure during te night when I will be ugly will not be very great. Because it will not be very much fun, or stimulating and erotic to make love to somebody as ugly as I am in that other form.

If on the other hand I am ugly during the day and beautiful during the night, you will have a wonderful time making love to me at night, and during the day people will continue to think what a terrible shame, what a terrible fate for poor Gawain. And I will continue to get these very bad vibes, these very bad feelings about myself being directed at me by all of your admirers. The one slight advantage of that arrangement would be that you will not have to worry about some of the other knights trying to run off with me, because I will be so ugly that they would not dream of it; this will be a slight advantate for you. And now, it is time for you to choose."

Sir Gawain said, "What a predicament. This is really a very difficult choice." And he weighed back and forth the various possibilities of each scenario, and each choice, and their consequences. And finally he said, "Well, I really cannot decide. This is such an important decision. I think that you should decide. You should choose." And at that moment the Hag Ragnell fully transformed into the Lady Ragnell, saying, "Thank you, for you have now released me from the rest of the spell."