In my aloneness ..in the nethotningness is the the anything and everything

And awww, the constant transformations of my very soul. No greater fear have I then to be sudenely seperated in a stange place from everyone i love or know....and here i sit in that very place. Another twilight zone if you will into the quanum pfisics of my reality.
Shall we start at the 'recent' beginings? The closer it got to the time of Lee's departer, my yin half, the more freakrent the 'panic' attacks. At first it started with the increase in insomnia.and the Good Mother herself knows i balance my enegry on two ruff hours as it is.
Then the nightmeres began.They were strange dreams and often could I pause in the moment of them, afffirming and awknoleddging the 'desavoue' while the dream is in progress. I would awake and denounce the dreams..ok..after a week of this i email my doc and say the meds aintt working. next thing i know i black out, fall down a flight of stairs have a seizure, three days of sivere spams and convulsions and now im sitiin in a strange place, cut off from my son and my cat!!! without a lick of food in the house ha ha if i had a phone id call pizza! lol! I got this laptop thatnks to lee and doug not leaving me totally stranded. Lee made it safe and soung to england visiting his mum! Bless you guys! And me, I'm due for a claudapin and a merical...........got those pics doc...dont know how to down load them yet!!