Daily OM...The Invisible Woman

To all those people who leave their ego behind for the greater good...

The Invisible Woman
By Nicole Johnson

It started to happen gradually. One day I was walking my son

Jake to school. I was holding his hand and we were about to

Cross the street when the crossing guard said to him, "Who is that

With you, young fella?"

"Nobody," he shrugged.

Nobody? The crossing guard and I laughed. My son is only 5,

But as we crossed the street I thought, "Oh my goodness, nobody?"

I would walk into a room and no one would notice. I would say

Something to my family...like "Turn the TV down, please"...and

Nothing would happen. Nobody would get up or even make a move

For the remote.

I would stand there for a minute, and then I would say
again, a little louder, "Would someone turn the TV down?"

Nothing.

Just the other night, my husband and I were out at a party.

We'd been there for about three hours and I was ready to leave.

I noticed he was talking to a friend from work, so I walked over,

and when there was a break in the conversation, I whispered,

"I'm ready to go when you are."

He just kept right on talking.

That's when I started to put all the pieces together.

I don't think he can see me. I don't think anyone can see me.

I'm invisible.

It all began to make sense, the blank stares, the lack of response,

The way one of the kids will walk into the room while I'm on the

Phone and ask to be taken to the store.

Inside I'm thinking, "Can't you see I'm on the phone?" Obviously not.

No one can see if I'm on the phone, or cooking, or sweeping the floor,

or even standing on my head in the corner, because no one can see me at all.

I'm invisible.

Some days I am only a pair of hands, nothing more:
Can you fix this? Can you tie this? Can you open this?

Some days I'm not a pair of hands; I'm not even a human being.

I'm a clock to ask, "What time is it?" I'm a satellite guide to answer,

"What number is the Disney Channel?" I'm a car to order, "Right

Around 5:30, please."

I was certain that these were the hands that once held books and

the eyes that studied history and the mind that graduated summa

Cum laude, but now they had disappeared into the peanut butter,

Never to be seen again.

She's going, she's going, and she's gone!

One night, a group of us were having dinner, celebrating the return

Of a friend from England. Janice had just gotten back from a

fabulous trip, and she was going on and on about the hotel she stayed in.

I was sitting there, looking around at the others all put together so well.

It was hard not to compare and feel sorry for myself as I looked down at my out-of-style dress; it was the only thing I could find that was clean. My unwashed hair was pulled up in a banana clip and I was afraid I could

Actually smell peanut butter in it. I was feeling pretty pathetic, when Janice turned to me with a beautifully wrapped package and said, "I brought you this."

It was a book on the great cathedrals of Europe. I wasn't exactly sure why she'd given it to me until I read her inscription: "To Charlotte, with admiration for the greatness of what you are building when no one sees."

In the days ahead I would read...no, devour...the book. And I would
discover what would become for me, four life-changing truths, after which

I could pattern my work:

* No one can say who built the great cathedrals; we have no record of
their names.

* These builders gave their whole lives for a work they would never

See finished.

* They made great sacrifices and expected no credit.

* The passion of their building was fueled by their faith that the eyes
of God saw everything.

A legendary story in the book told of a rich man who came to visit the
cathedral while it was being built, and he saw a workman carving a tiny
bird on the inside of a beam. He was puzzled and asked the man, "Why are
you spending so much time carving that bird into a beam that will be
covered by the roof? No one will ever see it."

And the workman replied, "Because God sees."

I closed the book, feeling the missing piece fall into place. It was
almost as if I heard God whispering to me, "I see you, Charlotte.

I see the sacrifices you make every day, even when no one
around you does. No act of kindness you've done, no sequin you've

Sewn on, no cupcake you've baked, is too small for me to notice and

Smile over. You are building a great cathedral, but you can't see right

Now what it will become."At times, my invisibility feels like an affliction. But it is not a
disease that is erasing my life. It is the cure for the disease of my
own self-centeredness. It is the antidote to my strong stubborn pride.

I keep the right perspective when I see myself as a great builder. As
one of the people who show up at a job that they will never see
finished, to work on something that their name will never be on.

The writer of the book went so far as to say that no cathedrals could

Ever be built in our lifetime because there are so few people willing

to sacrifice to that degree.

When I really think about it, I don't want my son to tell the friend
he's bringing home from college for Thanksgiving, "My mom gets

Up at 4 in the morning and bakes homemade pies, and then she
hand-bastes a turkey for three hours and presses all the linens
for the table."

That would mean I'd built a shrine or a monument to
myself. I just want him to want to come home. And then, if there

is anything more to say to his friend, to add, "You're going to love it there."

As mothers, we are building great cathedrals. We cannot be seen

If we're doing it right. And one day, it is very possible that the world

Will marvel, not only at what we have built, but at the beauty that has

Been added to the world by the sacrifices of invisible women.