Letting go, finding the flow
I'm not a frequent poster on this forum but I do read many of the posts, and it seems like there are still so many people who are confused and afraid in these changing times. I thought that maybe by sharing my own recent progress, others might find a bit more light for themselves....
So, ok, I guess I'll start by saying that I've struggled with my career for more than 13 years. Big time. I've had moderate success as a writer and author, but it has generally left me unhappy and broke. Following various whims, I've also worked as a landscape designer, community activist, non-profit director, marketing consultant, graphic designer, farmers market manager, and vintage clothing dealer. Still, not the right fit and not a lot of money.
While floundering in my career, I began to work on my self and my spirituality, always asking God to use me and guide me toward my higher purpose. I read books by Sanaya Roman, Doreen Virtue, Sonia Choquette, Summer McStravick, and many, many others. (God bless the library!) I also explored Tarot in depth and tried to journal and/or meditate as much as possible. In December 2007, I had a truly profound reading with Sonia Choquette, which opened my eyes to past life and spirit guide info that REALLY resonated with me. It also shed some light on my life purpose and my career troubles, but that was just the start...
I was making progress spiritually, talking to my angels every day, even though I could not "hear" them as clearly as some. At the same time, I was also knee-deep in a 9-year alcohol addiction, as was my husband. We felt happy together, but knew that neither of us was thriving. More needed to change. (Mind you, my husband is not the "spiritual" type.) So in early 2008, we sat down and created a new vision for our lives. We took stock of the things we really loved and what was really feeding our souls. And when we looked around at our life, it was SO obvious. The activities we had been dismissing as hobbies or time-killers - gardening, canning, art, bird feeding - were actually the things that got us most excited. Effortlessly.
We also noticed that our house was filled with many things that we didn't enjoy, junk that was just weighing us down. So we started selling things. And then cleaning. And basically clearing the slate - physically, mentally and emotionally - so that something new could enter our life. We curbed our drinking, started eating better, and began exercising regularly (thanks to a high-energy puppy that we "found" on the side of the road. Sure.)
I knew that I wanted to start a business, but I didn't know what. In the past, I had always abandoned my businesses before they had a chance to get going. This time, I took the time to really test my heart on a number of ideas, asking "Is this REALLY what's true and natural for me?" Ultimately, I decided on something pretty unusual - I would take my favorite homemade bird food recipes and open a bakery for wild birds! The doubts poured in. Surely, this can't be IT? But the Universe kept telling me otherwise, leaving hints and signs everywhere. My guides kept reminding me to jump in, let go, have fun! Still, I resisted. This idea is so silly, I thought, surely this cannot be my life purpose. I want something more important! But the angels were persistent.
I am not psychic or particularly skilled in energy or channeling, but I am telling you there were signs. I'd ask God, Is this REALLY my path? And a white feather would fall from nowhere. Or a book would come into my life. Or I'd hear a certain song. Or the Tarot would say the same thing over and over, despite serious shuffling. Or I'd find my 100th bird reference in the strangest place (and remember, I'm asking about starting a bird food company). Every time I asked for help or guidance or confirmation, something magical would appear.
All throughout 2008, my personal changes have absolutely mirrored the changes going on in the Universe - the surges of energy balanced by the lulls and endings. But the key for me has been to trust and just jump in. Even when it seems crazy. Even when I doubt whether it's really from God. Just let go and join the flow of life. Be your true, beautiful, easy self. And visualize! I can't say that enough. Once my husband and I started to paint a mental picture of the life we wanted, and took small steps toward it, we were positively floored to see it all start manifesting for real. Now it feels so awesome to finally be in a place of trust and hope, and to just KNOW that everything will work out fine!
We still have a ways to go, but our business is growing, our house and our bodies are being transformed, and our life is unfolding in so many wonderful ways. I can't say that this has been an easy transition....endings of any kind are always challenging. But it has truly yielded incredible joy and lovely surprises, even building on the many "course corrections" and perceived failures that I've experienced in the past.
I truly believe that the changing energies CAN propel us forward, if only we will let them. I wish all of you joyful beginnings and marvelous transformations in your own lives!
Love and light,
Shannon