I ask for extra light to be sent into my direction....thank you and i am most grateful..

Greetings! im not really sure what im going to write about.. this morning i checked my email and there was an email from my great aunt.. my grandamas little sister died at 54 last night. my aunt thought i already heard the news.. but unfortunatly i hadnt heard the news and the first i heard about it was staring at me across my computer screen...i re-read the line many times...and then my thoughts went to my family..her boys my 2nd cousins...but one is my age while the other is younger...i thought oh my God i couldnt imagine losing my mother...then my thoughts flashed to my grandma...oh my god that was here baby sister...then to my great grandma...she is getting ready to bury her baby...my great grandmother is like in her upper 80's.....and i felt so overwhelmed...i came out of the area where the computer is in the house trying to dial my mothers phone number. my girlfriend looks up and sees me and races to me...but im still fumbling with my phone...finally i get through...im crying mom what is going on...im on the phone with grandma right now...i will get off the phone so you can call her... im the light of my family so to speak... i am our foundation the strength...i may be 30 but i have always been the leader of my family. my mom had me when she was 16. her and her two sister were like siblings to me...my grandparents they were the parents...so i grew up knowing everyone in my family...i lived with my grandparents half of my life.. ive been the one where my aunts and my parents talked shit too about their parents my grandparents...and i always went back and fourth telling everyone they missed and loved each other...ive spoken before about my grandparents moving to New Mexico...and my life severly changing... my family also changed...when my grandparents left i felt like they left a mess with their own kids...they all battled...anyways we all have our own family dramas... but the girls my mom and her two sisters...well they just dont get along all the great...and now our whole family is being merged together to celerbrate my aunt deannas life...and honestly there is till plenty of balancing and releasing to go for my physical family. me and my girlfriend will be headed to bakersfield tomorrow to be there when my grnadparents get into state from new mexico... and i just ask that everyone keep me and my family in their prayers and light... for everything to come together in perfect love... there is going to be some sever hurt energy coming together..on top of the death (sorrow and mourning) there we will be anger hurt feelings of the split in our family... i just know in my heart everything is going to work out perfect and divine...as i sat alone today and centered myself...this voice came inside of me and said...you said your were ready...and i looked into the mirror and saiid i am ready...honestly im not scared but im not sure what it is im ready for...i have always been the glue...and i will be staying with my great aunt and uncle whom have taken me under the wing and have taught me and my girlfriend what a light worker is.. and so i just ask for good energy to be sent to help me and my loved ones to stay centered for this deeply needed moment within my family... and also to help release anything that isnt intuned to their proper soul paths! thank you for all who read this...im very grateful to be able to share my hurt with my family of light! my warmest and most loving smile to all...love and light sister and brothers for the time is getting closer and closer....
Shelly