A Poem (About Me - How I was, and then I am now)

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Sometime's all around me their is darkness no matter how softly I tread the intensity grows and my heart wonders why is this so, my footsteps seem so prominent and in my awareness it is like I wish to be invisible and unseen by the darkness as the hurt comes toward me from all sides for what reason my being can not seem to know.

Eventually I reach my home and close the door shutting out all the worries and the pain, Making a cuppa coffee and go to my chair and go about by small duties and think how this fear is so crazy like I am going insane.

A little voice in my head whispers to me and says in a voice so very sweet, oh my dear it is not your fault - for the only reason that you are feeling so much pain from the darker persons you pass in the street, is because your beakon shines so bright it is hard for them not to notice your presence you must smile at them and give them love not fear or concern then their power over you will become weak.

Today: 25th August 2008

Now my days are like a rollercoaster ride sometimes like now feeling a huge emptiness a hunger of the soul full of sadness for that which seems lost in me like missing a loved one and not knowing who that may be, my thoughts are thin with nothing to grasp hold of like waiting for a carriage to take me away to new places with new hope and love that I long so to see.

If only this was so on each day of my life filled with love and hope and the belief that my purpose was not so in vain, I yearn for that sweet voice to speak to me again, and say I am still here! but my life feels so empty sometimes like my reflection is not me and others see the things that I am not - only seeing my pain, and they fear what I may have done to make me this way and from approaching me they refrain.

How I wish my embrace was with only embrasing pure love and this would always be by my side, so my being can be free and glide high through the ether with all love in the heavens I can glide.

Oh why must I be so in such pain and not have happiness to endure why such heavy burdens from past lives with no decernability to at least give me a focus on those thing's that bear such great weight on my soul, this life is like the last two knots on a rope that I can not untie or loosen as though my hands are within them and no one to aid me be seen, the people that could help so distant and my cries so weak they can not hear how it would give hope if only for the face of an angel to glean.

Where am I now with the hope and the pain - what does this serve me why the burden to carry for what reason and where do I go now? I hear foot steps from someone who approaches will I be seen, as I am all bound within my pain and offer me a hand, and yet they walk past me like their was reason to not intervene.

26th August 2008
I wrote this for AngelLights but thought I would share it here:

* Imagine an early morning when everytime you pull back the curtains a dove is sitting there waiting for you on your window ledge singing a sweet song, then everyday your heart will feel full of love and the sweet sounds will be make your days happy and never to long.

14th September 2008

Tonight I am again spiritualy inspired, when searching with light I never grow tired. Darkness has no power over me as the light swirls under the door, for it takes only a crack to fill darkness and illuminate the room as never before. In the light their can never be pain, only those that hide away in darkness will eventually go insane. This little poem may seem so small, yet to heed these words means we can always be all knowing and those with ignorance can never do harm to us at all.

(Work in progress)

By Chelle