Loving Ones-Self

I am not even sure where to begin on this one.. except that last night I couldn't sleep, itched like mad and had dreams where someone was attacking me and I finally had to stab them and shove them in a closet, but then it turned out to not really be me that did the stabbing and the cramming, that some woman was there, and she was hateful and I was trying to hide my kids from some man that was after us... trying to keep control of me and how I lived.So, then the dream switches back to the house, where bodies are crammed all over, because the woman was killing things off - people and animals that visited.. and cramming them in closets and cubbies. I couldn't figure out how the man that was over didn't smell it, but he didn't even notice. Everytime I would come back into the house, part of it was cleaned up... slowly, corner by corner. Then she was deciding to move and was going to leave her dogs without food and water and I moved them to the neighbors to take care of so they wouldn't die, but she couldn't know about it. Then I woke up... so, wierd eh?

Of course, it could have been the bottle of wine I consumed before bed, LOL. This latest batch of purging and ridding myself of things that no longer serve is probably going to be the most difficult. It is the last bit of "dysfunctional" self-sabotaging habits that now have to go... I can't decide if I am terrified or excited. Maybe both. We'll see how that goes. Love to you all... K