Healing your Self is a very personal thing, especially when you’re working on healing your Self on the inside. It can make you feel alone at times. And sometimes it feels like an uphill battle. I heard somewhere that we only feel true reward, true achievement when we’ve surpassed our own expectations of what we thought we could achieve or accomplish. Maybe our expectations for ourselves are too high, maybe too low. Maybe we don’t believe in ourselves enough or maybe the only battles worth winning are the internal battles we have with our Selves.

Who said life had to be so hard? And who said healing ourselves had to be any harder? I’m ready for some downward battles in my life. In fact, I’m ready to not have any battles at all. Smooth sailing is what I’m ready for. Aren’t you? As I write this, my first thought is, ‘Wouldn’t that be nice? Refreshing even?’ And then my next thought is, ‘How do I make that happen?’ I’m sure you’re wondering the same thing.

We can’t hide our feelings. I know I can’t. And whenever I try, it’s like a beacon of light is shining from my head. It’s like when you try to be quiet but each time you take a step the floor creaks. Impossible! I can’t hide anything. The only solution I’ve found is to face my feelings and feel them. Hiding them only pushes them deeper inside, which can make me sick at times. It’s better to look at them when they’re on the surface…like when the waves are rocking my boat. I’ve found this to be the fastest way of healing my Self.

And it sounds so simple, doesn’t it? Feel your feelings? Who would have thought this is what healing is all about? Funny and ironic that the drug companies have made hundreds of pills to help us stop feeling our feelings, to make us feel numb. The doctors are pushing them and the pharmacists are selling them like candy. And we, like sheep to the slaughter, are listening to them instead of our Self. We are looking for the answers outside of our Self instead of inside our Self, which is where they live.

We know deep inside that pills, drugs and even alcohol are not the answer, so what would happen if we said no? What would happen if we made a stand for our Selves, for our feelings? What would happen if we realized we had value? That our feelings had value? Then what? Well, I imagine the world would be a better place. I imagine people would get real. They would begin to feel alive again. They would stand up and say “YES, I am mad as hell, but I feel alive.”

“I’m feeling my feelings, so now what?” you might ask. And I would tell you to trace them back to the very beginning to where they began. Get to the root of what you’re feeling. If you’re feeling mad or sad or stressed or depressed, you need to get to the root of that feeling in order to see how to resolve it. Your negative feeling is like a weed in your garden. If you don’t pull it out by the                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        root, it’ll just grow back again and again, and each time with a vengeance, making it harder to get to the root and pull it out once and for all. How many times has that happened to you when you’re out in your garden weeding? Seems like the same weeds keep popping back up again and again, doesn’t it? And that can become quite frustrating.

Well it’s exactly the same with your negative feelings. The end result is what you’re feeling, so feeling mad is the end result of something, right? That something is the root you want to dig up and remove. So you gotta take a moment and start digging for the root. Most of the time you think you already know what the root is before you even start digging, but the reality is that you’ll only truly know after you’ve dug, not before. Interesting dichotomy, isn’t it?

So the next time a negative feeling comes, take a moment to trace it back to the beginning; to it’s roots. This is where you might shed a few tears, which helps you realize that you found the root. This is where you might have to forgive someone or even better, you might have to forgive your Self. More than likely it’s a mistake you or someone you know made or a simple misunderstanding that wasn’t resolved. And once you realize that and make peace with it, it goes away…the root is pulled and the weed doesn’t grow back. That’s how healing happens.

Without these mistakes and misunderstandings, we wouldn’t learn and grow as human beings. We wouldn’t evolve and become the better, more loving, considerate, tolerant, patient and forgiving people we are here to be. Everyone is our brother and sister and if we truly did treat them like we would like to be treated, the world would definitely be a better place for all of us.

So the next time you find yourself feeling mad, sad, stressed or depressed, remember instead of ignoring that wave or letting it get bigger, take a few moments to ride that wave of emotion, take a few moment to tend to your Self, to your garden…All you really need is a little weeding!